`My HIV doctor doesn’t listen to what I say, and is always in a hurry'

The bottom line: you can ask to see a different doctor, or could go to a different clinic.

The relationship you have with your doctor is crucial - the decisions you make together will have a long term impact on your health. In order to feel in control of your health, you need to have confidence in your doctor and feel comfortable with him or her.

It’s important that you are given enough information about the choices on offer, have the chance to describe side effects or symptoms, and are able to discuss any problems you may have taking the drugs on time. 

Building a trusting relationship can take some time. If you feel able to talk to the doctor about how the relationship could be improved, that may help. But if you don’t think you will ever develop a rapport with this doctor, it’s probably worth asking to see a different one.

Changing your doctor or clinic

At large clinics, it should be quite easy to switch doctors. At smaller clinics there may be fewer staff, so the choice won’t be endless.

If you’re able to stay at the same clinic, the new doctor will have access to your medical notes straightaway. If you are satisfied with most things about your clinic apart from the doctor, staying there may be a good idea. You shouldn’t be treated any differently by the clinic because you’ve asked to change doctor.

You could also change clinic. It’s up to you which hospital you go to, as long as it provides HIV services. It doesn’t have to be in the area where you live.

Other people with HIV, local HIV organisations and your clinic’s patient representative (if there is one) may be able to tell you about doctors and clinics who have a good reputation. 

But it’s not a good idea to chop and change doctors and clinics frequently. If you see the same doctor regularly, you’ll have a better chance of building up a good relationship.

What you can expect from your doctor

Some people with HIV like to ask lots of questions and get very involved in treatment decisions. This isn’t everyone’s style, and others prefer to let their doctor take the lead.

Whatever your approach, you can expect your doctor to:

• explain things clearly to you
• give you a range of options
• tell you about the risks and benefits of each option
• answer your questions in a way you understand
• pay attention to your concerns
• respect your confidentiality
• treat you as an individual
• offer you the best available treatments.

In return, it will help your doctor if you prepare for your appointment. Make a list of the issues and questions you want to discuss, so that you don’t forget anything. Make sure you tell your doctor about any health problems you’re having, including illnesses, symptoms and side effects. If you are honest about any difficulties you have taking your medicines, the doctor may be able to help you find solutions.

Check-ups are usually every three to six months. Try to book your appointments in advance, and attend as planned. If you can’t come, call the clinic in advance to fix a new date. If you turn up without an appointment, you may not be able to see your usual doctor.

Other people who can help

If you’re unhappy about things at the clinic, it’s worth asking if the clinic has a patient representative or a patient forum. They may have experience of getting these kind of problems resolved.

If getting enough time with the doctor is a specific problem, you could ask if there are other ways of getting support when you need it:

• Could a nurse specialist or other member of staff help?
• Could you phone or email with a question?
• Could you have longer or more frequent appointments?

If English is not your first language, you might want extra support. Communication difficulties could mean that you don’t get the most out of your time with the doctor. Ask if translators or advocates are available to help you.