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Sex & sexualityGrowing up and entering the world of sex and relationships can seem confusing and worrying at first - we're here to answer your questions and give you some support. | ![]() |
As people become more mature, they usually find themselves feeling emotionally and sexually attracted to others and interested in having relationships. You may find yourself interested in having relationships with people of the opposite sex, same sex, or even both sexes. Whatever your sexuality, it is completely normal and it is likely that at some stage you will meet someone who is interested in you too.
Most people experience having a crush on someone. Having a crush is when you are very attracted to a person, thinking about them all the time and feeling like you are in love with them. Having a crush can feel very exciting, especially when you see, speak to or think about the object of your affection, but it can also make you feel sad if they aren’t interested in you or there is not a chance that you will ever meet them, if you have a crush on a celebrity.
This is a very normal part of growing up though, and as you go through life you will probably have crushes on lots of people.
If you fancy someone and think that you would like to have a relationship with them, then a first step would be getting to know them better. One way of doing this is to ask them out on a date, so that you can spend time together and see how you get on. It can be really nerve-wracking asking someone out, but the worst that can happen is that they will say no. Don’t worry if they do, you will meet someone who is interested in you at some point, and maybe they will ask you out!
When you are in a relationship there can be an expectation that you will definitely have sex, or sexual experiences with your partner. Whilst exploring sex can be very exciting, it is important that you feel comfortable and ready for sex or sexual contact, and are not pressured into doing anything that you don’t feel happy with. Remember, it does not matter if your friends are all having sex, when all you want to do is kiss and hold hands. It is your body and no-one else should decide what you do with it.
If you do want to have sex and are exploring taking things further in your relationship, that’s fine too. What’s important is that you know how to protect yourself, or your partner, from unplanned pregancy, sexually transmitted infections, and HIV. It's vital that you can talk to your partner about having safer sex.
Experiencing the end of a relationship is something that most people will go through at some point. When a relationship ends you might experience lots of different feelings, depending on why you broke up. Feeling sad, worried, angry, relieved, insecure or upset is completely normal, and it may be a few weeks or months before these feelings go away. Talking to friends and family about how you are feeling can be really helpful, and giving yourself time to get over it can be important. Try not to rush into new relationships until you feel ready, but remember that there will be someone out there who suits you.
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