If you are going through your transition, your relationships may be affected. If you have a partner or are married, there will be a lot of things to take into consideration. If your partner has always known that you’re trans, it may make the process easier – but your transition is likely to have a major impact on your relationship, especially if children are involved.
If you have been moving towards transitioning for a while, your partner may feel well prepared but there are steps you can take to make things easier. They may find it difficult, or even upsetting, to relate to you as a ‘different’ person, even though they will want you to be happy.
It could be that your transition signals the end of your relationship – you or your partner might feel unable to carry on, especially if your sexual orientation has changed. It may be that your partner is supportive but is not able to remain in a sexual relationship with you.
This can be a confusing time for both of you, even though it marks the start of your new life. It could help to have counselling together or separately so you can see how you can continue your relationship – whether as romantic partners or friends.
On the other hand, you might hope to continue your relationship after you transition. Again, counselling may help both of you to find your way.
Transitioning and sexual orientation
When you transition, your sexual orientation may change. If you remain in your relationship, it will probably take time for your partner to get used to your ‘new’ relationship. Take time to get to know each other again – counselling may help through this process.
Support for partners of trans people:
GIRES is a source of good information for partners. It also runs support groups and workshops for the family of trans people.
Distinction also provides support to couples where one partner is going through transition.